Girlfriend Pulled Away? 4 Ways To Handle It Like A Boss

In our previous post, we talked about four reasons why women might pull away from men. Here, we are going to talk about four ways to handle a girlfriend pulling away like a boss and not like most men out there.

1. Accept She Pulled Away

Every woman you met and her sister has met a guy who acted like a butthurt, little bitch when at some point she decided to pull away from him. This is where mature, charming men and immature, little boys differ. Mature, charming men don’t live in a fairy tale. They accept things for what they are, not for what they wish they WOULD or SHOULD be.

If you don’t develop acceptance in your relationships with women, you will never be happy. Resisting reality and fighting another human being’s decision not to be with you any longer is a source of unnecessary suffering. Mature, charming men see the signs.

• They are observant.

• They are realists.

• When they see that their girlfriend pulls away or that she turned from hot to cold, they pay attention.

• They recognize it as their new reality with her.

Why acceptance of a woman’s behavior is key for your happiness as a modern man? Because if you don’t accept it, you will fight it. Your first boyish instinct will be to “fight her decision” or “do something about this situation”.

Yes, taking action is part of your masculine core, but there are times with women when “no action” is the best action. When your girlfriend pulls away or shows you less affection than previously, you should not fight it because you risk seeming like a needy little boy who “fights” for his mother’s attention and love. But, as we established in another post, she is not your mother.

So, observe that her mood and attitude towards you changed and be calm about it.

• Don’t ask her why she is cold.

• Don’t ask her why she isn’t in contact with you any more.

• Don’t complain or resist the situation.

2. Don't Chase Her

Don’t do these things when she is next to you and don’t do these things especially via text. When you see that your woman’s emotions and behavior changed towards you, remain calm, peaceful, and Stoic. If she wants to verbalize her own attitude towards you, she will. And if she doesn’t, then there is your answer.

You don't start calling her or texting her like a maniac or like a child who got abandoned by a parent. You don't start to apologize to her out of the blue, thinking it was YOUR fault, you don't second guess yourself, you don't dwell into "what if" thinking: if I had done such and such thing, she wouldn't have pulled away etc.

These are toxic and dangerous games that your mind plays with you. When your brain thinks there is a crisis, real or imagined, it reveals all your insecurities, all your weak points. Be aware of this process and don’t allow your mind to invent reasons for self-blame or self-deprecating thoughts. By not chasing her you actually become a curiosity to her.

Most men she pulled away from DID chase.

• They called her multiple times.

• They sent her long-ass texts to make her change her mind.

• They got angry at her.

• They tried to guilt trip her.

But you? You acted like a boss, by keeping your cool; by managing yourself; by controlling your thoughts and emotions; by minding your business. You managed to do the impossible: you did NOTHING when all men in her life did TOO MUCH.

3. Mirror Her Behavior

It’s so simple, yet so many men can’t pull it off. If a woman has the courage to pull away from you, if she has the balls to reduce her communication with you, if she can remove her sex or affection from you, why can’t you?

When a girl practically tells you with her behavior “I am not that into you any more”, it is not the moment to reply “but I am still into you!”.

This is one of these cases where you will be better off following the path of least resistance. Nothing fancy here. No need for some kind of action plan to “change her mind”. You do what she does: you pull away; you remove your interest from her.

Give her space. When a woman pulls away, it's important to respect her need for space and time. It’s her decision and you must be ok with it. Don't try to force her to stay or convince her to change her attitude. Instead, give her EXACTLY what she is showing you that she wants: distance. This can help prevent further conflict or resentment towards you.

But it’s not just that. When a girl pulls away from you, but you remain there with an unchanged attitude towards her, you are actually rewarding her for bad behavior. It’s like giving her a free pass to remove her interest from you, while you stay stuck in your current emotional position. Don’t do that.

Women are not attracted to men who reward them without deserving it. Women want men who actually reward them when there is a good reason for it. Otherwise, you will end up being her free validation source. If you are reading Men of Charm, our guess is that your goals with women are more ambitious than that.

4. Get Back To Your Life

You shouldn’t even need to “get back” to your life. You should always BE in your life whether you have women or not; whether these women are hot or cold to you. When a girl you are dating, changes her mind about you, it’s time to get back to your own business full force.

Focus on your own growth: use this time to focus on your own personal growth and development. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, such as hobbies, exercise, or spending time with friends and family. This will not only help to distract you from the pain of the situation, but will also make you a more attractive and exciting man to be around.

Give permission to yourself to go out and approach other women. A man who lives his life in abundance doesn’t treat one single girl as the only source of his happiness. He is a man with a rich life anyway, and if one girl pulls away, oh well he will spread out his masculine energy to find other women who are willing to give him the sex and the emotions he wants to experience.

Did your girlfriend pull away from you?

Did a girl you dated turned from hot to cold?

Don’t worry. Take action. Book a coaching call with us.